Go Away, 2020!!!

Is this nightmare of a year over yet?!

Looking back on this blog, I am so embarrassed that I only have 4 entries, including this one, for 2020. Well, that should tell you a lot about how this past year went. Believe me, there were times where all I wanted to do was sit behind my keyboard and type away releasing as much negativity and anger as I could. There were days when I was feeling creative and wanted to express some ideas and share some perspectives. But alas, my time and my energy were under such limitations this year. Anyways, as is my tradition on New Year's Eve, let me recap this past year with a few thoughts and opinions. Shall I start with the positive or the negative? Forget the order...I'm just going to write as I feel tonight. If the past year can be chaotic, so can my mind.

The beginning of the year started out fairly well for me. I was pretty active on Periscope and spent a lot of my free time exploring the different illuminations and winter events. Through Periscope, I was offered an ambassadorship on an app that promoted travel and popular sightseeing spots in Japan. It was a great concept where broadcasters would do live streaming and patrons could ask questions about each place as the broadcaster was sharing it. The app hosted concierges that could be contacted and they would help set up reservations or travel requests. Broadcasters and concierges could be tipped for their services and as a broadcaster, it was a nice bit of a little extra income. I really enjoyed broadcasting for them and the people who worked for the app were extremely supportive and kind. Unfortunately, the cost of running and maintaining the app made it difficult to continue paying broadcasters and eventually, the app closed or changed the way it was being run.

Then came the arrival of the New Corona virus, referred to now as Covid-19. I've talked about it in my previous entry. Despite a growing amount of concern and anxiety, one of the positive things that came about was an invitation to submit an article for a publication. I was very honored. The article was an opinion post about former Prime Minister Abe's request to close down the schools as the number of Covid-19 cases in Japan started to escalate. My article talked about how I supported that decision. So as horrible as 2020 was beginning, I felt like the year was giving me opportunities that perhaps I never would have had previously.

All of a sudden, those opportunities turned into challenges. Like most schools all over the world, we had to start teaching remotely. My school chose to create Google Classrooms for each grade level. With very little guidelines or instructions, we were expected to teach our classes as best as we could. Thank god I was paired to teach with someone who had the same level of commitment and motivation that I had so that we could deliver the best possible online video lessons for our students! I could never have survived the challenges of this year without my teaching partner. His expertise in technology, patience and sense of humor got me through some very rough times. When I look back on that first term, I truly believe that we did everything that I think a good teacher is supposed to do. We learned new skills. We took risks. We created. We communicated and collaborated. We taught the content and curriculum we had planned out in the most innovative ways we could to maintain a stable program and keep the motivation and interest of our young learners alive. With remote learning, video lessons and interactive live classroom platforms such as Google Meet and Zoom, the one thing I think the teachers at my school forgot was that this was our window to our school to let students and parents connect and see what was happening in education. Parents were forced to take a more active role in what was happening and I knew it was important for us teachers to show them our best efforts and how dedicated we were to teach our subject matter to their children using a format that they could understand and learn from. It was a whole new learning experience for me, but one I feel extremely proud of.

Another positive point of this crazy year was being able to work from home. Yes, it was quite challenging and time-consuming and it took video-making to a whole new level, BUT I was able to work with Sinbad by my side and with Mom safely upstairs doing her own thing. Time with loved ones is so precious. Being able to spend so much more time at home this past year is something I will be appreciative of forever.

Summer vacation was a blur. Our exchange trip to Brisbane was canceled. Actually, it was postponed, but eventually, it was canceled. As disappointed as I was not to be able to travel, it meant not having to worry about how Sinbad would fare in the pet hotel. It was something I was very worried about especially after what had happened the previous year when he had a sort of anxiety attack. That being said, we had quite a scare at the end of August. The groomers and the female vet had advised that Sinbad no longer have grooming appointments. With his age and his tracheal collapse, the vet was worried that Sinbad could be put under too much physical strain if he had to stand for an extended period of time or if he became too excited/stressed during the grooming procedures. Of course, I agreed. However, we did plan to do one final haircut on August 26th. After I dropped him off, the groomers called me and Sinbad was put in intensive care. He freaked out when they were going to cut his toenails and I guess he was getting overheated and having an attack. The vet was going to do some tests on him, but in the meantime, he was put in a cage where the temperatures were cool to keep him from having heatstroke. It was really scary for me. They kept close watch on him and warned me that he may need to stay overnight. Thankfully, he returned back to a safe condition and the vet gave him the okay to come home. They put him on a new medication to add to all his other medications. I had to cool down the temperature in my car before we transferred him back into the car. Since that day, Sinbad has been doing well. He will be 14 next month and I know how lucky I am to have him in my life for so long especially after all the medical issues he has had. I am grateful to his veterinarians and I pray that he can continue to stay strong and healthy so we can be together for another precious year.

School resumed in September and I could go on and on about the things I'm happy with and the things I'm not so happy with, but we'll save that for another blogpost since I only have 30 minutes left of 2020.

Let's skip to November. We got some heartbreaking news from my cousin Vicky. My aunt (my mom's middle sister) passed away right before Thanksgiving. We don't really know all the details but I believe the death certificate listed the death as a diabetic condition? My aunt was not feeling well and I guess after several phone calls, she was not picking up or answering messages. My cousin's husband called the police to check in on her and they found her passed away in bed. Was it Covid-19 related? It could have been. The news hit us all very hard and it was really difficult for me to see how devastated my mom was. My mom has lost a lot of her close friends and I know I need to learn how to be more patient. We are different in a lot of ways. I get so angry with her when she "gives up" or just doesn't have the drive or the ambition to learn how to do something or to keep fighting. It's something I will need to work on in 2021. It's so weird how I have always been the type to fight for everything I feel strongly about and I keep pushing until I make something work whereas she will just bow down and choose not to move forward. It's frustrating for me, but as she always tells me, this is what makes her happy.

All right, I need to wrap this up and get ready to ring in the new year. In a nutshell, Covid-19 made 2020 the absolute worst year I've ever been forced to experience. I HATED what happened this year in the US. I 100% believe that Black Lives Matter and the racism and discrimination that occurs in our world needs to be addressed because peace cannot be attained until Black Lives Matter and that includes Black Transgender lives. I join others in mourning the deaths of people who left this world before their time and it seems like there were so many deaths in 2020 that should have been prevented.

Five more minutes until we begin 2021...my resolution for the new year is the same as I make every year: to live each day to the fullest without any regrets and to keep my heart filled with love, compassion and understanding. I pray that the lives of my family, Sinbad and my friends and their families remain strong, safe and healthy as we enter this new year. Please, please, PLEASE let it be better than 2020 was.

Here we go...